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Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Okay....I'm sucking it up slowly....getting off my "woe is me" highhorse...I'll be back tonight or tomorrow....just having a little bout of my semi-normal depression.....But...I feel the fog lifting...I'll be back...promise!!



Lasik Complications

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

I have often thought about getting Lasik eye surgery surgery so I would not have to wear glasses or contacts anymore. I been reading up on it and am pretty well pleased to learn that USAEyes did a study and found that fewer than 3% of patients opting for Lasik surgery get Lasik Complications Although extremely rare, complications may arise. Those odds are pretty impressive. I think I'd be willing to gamble on those odds if I NEVER had to wear glasses or have red eyes from my contacts. If you are considering Lasik surgery, then you should definitely visit the site, ComplicatedEyes.org. The site has tons of information written in layman's terms, not a lot of technical jargon. Okay...so check it out and ..I'll be seeing ya!!


Sure They Look All Innocent and Adorable

But they are not. They are just mean ass cats. I don't know why they have chosen me to fall victim to their maniacal tricks. What do they do you ask? Well, let's see...hmmm...My laundry room has a folding table thingy I came up with. As you can see the litter box is right below it.
I swear by all things holy that if these two were hard and fast asleep, they would hear me unloading the dryer....it is at this time both crawl in the box and take the most godawful crap known to mankind. I have been leaning over getting something outta the dryer and they do it right then!! It is a sickening smell...It's worst than cat shit...oh wait...it is cat shit. Another one of their evil deeds? They wait until I am scooping out the litter box and turn my back put the bag of poop and pee in the plastic bag and then the trashcan, you know...the clumps...when I am not looking at them for all of 1/2 minute, yep....you guessed....The"time to make her gag" plan has commenced!!

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Not The Brightest Light Bulb In The Chandelier

A few weeks ago in Effingham County two very bright individuals were arrested for transporting the makings of meth. I'm sure there is an "official" charge name for that, but I don't know it :) How were these two rocket scientists caught? Well it seems these bright individuals were at a gas station and a policeman noticed the smell of the chemicals. That's right, instead of using a nice, secure and airtight transfer tank Considering the potency of these chemicals, the authorities wear Haz Mat outfits before they even get near the stuff, I am sure these braniacs' brains were fried and therefore thought the smell was quite lovely.


Darn...I Miss All The Good Stuff...

Monday, May 21, 2007

Joey, Justin and Nicklaus left really early Saturday morning to attend a meeting at their hunting club. When they returned, Nicklaus had to following to say:

Nicklaus: I farted like a grown man in the Huddle House, I bet they think Daddy or Justin did it.(giggling)

Mom: Nicklaus!! How could you do that? It's gross and rude!

Nicklaus: I know Mom, but I ate an omelette and it just fired up the ole' pants cannon. (giggle, giggle, giggle)

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I Think It Would Be Just Too Awesome...

Saturday, May 19, 2007

To pack the mini-van to the gills, grab the kids and head South to Florida. Not only are the beaches far superior to any we have here in Georgia, it has tons of theme park activities. I know the tickets cost a small fortune, but if we could find another family to split the cost of a Disney vacation home we could probably swing it bylate summer, if we save and budget extremely well.
The only problem is we don't know many people, if any, that have children around our kids ages. I guess we have until late summer to meet some people also...lol


That Boy Makes Me So Proud...

I forgot to tell all of y'all about Nathan's, ummm...performance at the Staff-vs-Students Kickball Game. He began doing some sort of interpretive dance, it reminded on of Squidward on SpongeBob Square Pants. He had the attention of half the parents on the next set of bleachers. He twirled, he wiggled, he lifted his leg up. He was just a little dancin' fool. While all of the parents were watching him gyrate, he suddenly stopped, looked at his Daddy and proclaimed, "I just took a big dump...." This is surely one of those heartwarming occurrences that I, as a mother, will cherish lovingly for every day of my life....BWAHAHAHAHA

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Hubby starts his new job on Monday. If you recall it's with the same company he just received a promotion. He's paid by the job and the department he was in hasn't had a lot of work for months now. However he was put in charge of another division, still installing cabinets, and he's got more work than he knows what to do with. I am so glad we will go back to living a semi-comfortable life again!! I am really hoping that I can get the kids bedding within the next few months. I want to completely re-do each of their rooms, maybe before too long I'll get to!

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I Don't Understand It...Is It Only In The South?

I've noticed, for the past month or so, that a lot of the trucks here are sporting what appears to be a huge pair of testicles hanging from the trailer hitch. Not willing to just wonder what the heck they were, I went to Google and entered the search term, "testicles on trailer hitch." Although I did not get an answer as to why someone would want to hang a sac of balls off their vehicle, I did find a site that sells "bumper nuts." And what a selection they have. Here are a few examples:

Flesh Colored (if you're Caucasian)

Flesh Colored (if you're not)

Blue Balls (for married men)

I still do not get the purpose of it. I have no clue why you'd want them. Is this only in the South? Or has this idiocy spread throughout our great nation? Is having a rebel flag and gun rack in your truck required to sport these dandies? I did take my camera tonight when we went out for a while to try and snap a pic or two, but for the first time in a long time, I didn't see anyone?

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I Could Not Live Without My....

Digital CAMERA!! I don't know how I did before. When I bought the first one, my favorite one of all time, I didn't know how long your average battery would last in it. It seemed like all of ten minutes. I spent a fortune at first on batteries, then Momz got wise and bought a battery charger and a pack or two of rechargable batteries. I NEVER worry about missing a cool shot of the kidz or whatever now. I always have a pair of backup batteries with me, so I NEVER miss a photo opp!!


Just an Observation...

I've been pondering this topic for awhile. Just didn't know how exactly to word it for a post. I'll give it my best shot. It's not an overtly religious one, really. I have noticed this for years and it really confuses me. The puzzling issue? Okay, here goes:

Has anyone else ever noticed amongst the Internet or elsewhere that if a person is an agnostic or atheist or whatever the only religion that really just irks the crap outta them is Christianity? I mean, I've read blogs by atheists and the like. In fact I have several I read regularly, most I don't comment on, others I might. I've noticed that even some of the atheists have no problem whatsoever with invoking advice or the like from any deity (Buddha, for example) but they will want to kill someone if they mention God or more specifically Jesus. If you don't believe in anything, yet find something relevant in Buddhist teachings, it's fine. If someone else may point out something that Jesus said in His teachings or whatever, then the non-believers will wanna lynch you. I guess my dilemma is, most people do admit that Jesus was a real person, he did walk the Earth for 33 years teaching and such. Even if you do not recognize Him as Messiah, why would the mere mention of His name provoke such outright hostility? How come you can't reference something He said or did as an example of something? Why is the Dali Lama okay to cite, yet you are a hate-mongering fool if you mention Christ? Even if you don't believe in Him as I do, aren't any of his teachings okay to reference? Why does His name inspire such hatred? If you mention Hindu teachings, fine....however, don't you dare bring up that horrible name, Jesus? Just a question in life I have yet to figure out.

***Please note, I am not talking about the idiots who spout off about how Jesus would kill all gay people, or if you are not a Christian you deserve to die or you destined to burn in hell . I mean people who are invoking something positive that Jesus said or did. "Love your neighbor" "He who is without sin, cast the first stone, etc...***

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I have such a hard time buying gifts for my mom at times. A lot of times it's just the money, or lack thereof, that creates the problem. Other times it's that my mom doesn't like us spending money on her. She'd rather we just show up at church every Sunday, that's gift enough. My sister made her a beautiful flower garden and buys stuff for that for her. I am supposed to be doing a scrapbook for her....it's started, I just have not done any scrapbooking since we moved into our house. Lack of motivation, lack of time, lack of energy, lack of something has kept me from it. I have a nice desk to start working on it, all organized and such, just haven't done anything with it. I do know she really likes cosmetics and such. Especially the creams and lotions and all that jazz that goes on your face and such. I am thinking of buying her something from the skinceuticals line of products. I think she'd really like trying a few new products. I hope so anyway....that scrapbook ain't exactly throwing itself together!!


Freebie Friday Time....

Okay...So, I am late, but it's here. You try taking care of a bi-polar husband, a kid with ADD, a Drama Queen, a very active 3 year old, a turtle, 2 cats, a dog and still blog for pay and blog to play. That's my little "gee my life is so hard" post for today....more to follow I am sure...BWAHAHAHAHA

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Nicklaus was quite the happy kid...

He took his money that his Aunt Livey sent him for his grades, the money he got for losing a tooth and another few dollars he'd saved up and bought himself a new game for the PS2. (Yep, we're still on dial-up, out here in the boonies we'd have to pay $50+ a month for DSL, so as far as games go...it's PS2 around here.) He bought JAWS. It's not a new release game so it was only $ 19.89 at" the place we do not speak of." Let me tell ya...that's one bad ass shark. It can jump on the beach and grab people....forget about going into the water...don't even hit the sand honey!! You should have seen him though...he was MR. BIG buying his own items, with his own money. But, he earned it through hard work....and kissing up to Auntie Linda all the time...LOL

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Our wonderful camping trip is in the works!

Friday, May 18, 2007

I've decided to brave the outdoors and go camping soon with the family. I've called the campground, which is in a state park not far from here and verified that there ARE bathroom facilities and I won't have to tinkle in the woods. I've also looked into Portable Water Filters and I am definately thinking they are something to look into. I don't know how well this trip will go. It may be my first foray into sleeping outside since I was about 10 years old. I don't know. We'll see. We'll probably be going the last of this month or the beginning of next month. You know I'll post all about it when we do, with pictures of course!!



Finally Got Hubby to Agree to Eat Healthier...

My man is all southern. If a supper don't have something fried in it, well it ain't complete. Well, he went to the doctor today and was basically told, "You're too heavy and you have high blood pressure." Between his diet and the Zyprexa for bi-polar he takes his blood pressure is sky high and he's only 31!! So, now we're going to start eating healthier around here, and he's on Diovan for the high blood pressure.

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Another Vacation Idea

I would really love to take the kidz down to Florida and do the whole theme park thing sometime. The expense of the parks for a family of five is overwhelming to say the least, then you have the cost of hotels. We are always so cramped in the standard 2 bed hotel room. I would love to go and instead of getting a hotel, be able to have a Florida rental vacation ! I mean, it would be so much nicer to rent a home, condo or townhouse and we'd have plenty of room for everyone. I'm not promising to cook every night though, kitchen or not, it would be my vacation too!!


A New and Different Sort Of Blog

Thursday, May 17, 2007

I received an email to check out a new blog last week. I really like the layout and the content. It's about a couple doing everything they can to have a baby. The difference? It's from the man's point of view! It's called "Maybe Baby" and it's written by the future father. It's really a different look into a side of infertility that most people know nothing about, the male's take on things. So, check it out!!

**Click MaybeBaby link above to be taken to blog** And, don't forget to tell him that MomIsNutz sent ya!!



A Three Hour Tour....

When thinking of dream vacations, I would rank Crewed Yacht Charters very high on the list of "want to do someday." I think it would be an awesome experience, an over the top vacation. To put it out the stratosphere though, the Skipper, Gilligan and The Professor would have to be on board, and I wouldn't want to get stuck on some desert island for years. Unless, the millionaire and his wife were gonna give me tons of money when we got rescued!!


I Am So Hot!!

I swear to all things holy, I could not make this crap up. I just had to share an email with you all that I received tonight. Just when I thought ol' Momz had lost the sexiness factor, from outta nowhere come my justification that I still got it. Apparently young Thaddeus thinks "older" women are hot. Unfortunately, I do not think young men who write such ignorant emails are. So, I don't think we'll be "talking" anytime soon. And dear Thaddeus, before you call me a bitch....let me remind you that I prefer, "Queen Bitch!"

From:Thaddeus Sylvester
To: momisnutz@earthlink.net
Date: 5/17/2007 1:44:49 AM
Subject: Hi mom

so i checked out ur blog and would like to know a little more about you. I'm 20, an interested in older women. If even you feel like talking... get back to me. I also recently started a blog... check it out at tks989.blogspot.com

He has two posts. One is more or less an introduction, minus any wit. The other? A post about a character on Adult Swim. Which, and I quote young Thaddeus as he states so eleoquently, that his "... latest craze these days are for Shin Chan."



Saving & Dreaming...

Since we only have one vehicle and the end of the school year is fast approaching, we really need 2 vehicles. I cannot be trapped in this house all summer with all three of my HELLIONS children. We've thrown a lot of makes and models around, but after trying to find the lowest car insurance quote for some of the models we're thinking of, we decide that we can't afford the insurance for a lot of them. Plus, a family of five in a Porsche or Ferrari is not really a practical choice I suppose. Hey...a mom can dream, can't she? :-)


What A Week!

The past week has been very busy around the Nutz household. On Thursday of last week we had Nicklaus' Field Day at school. The highlight of that was the kickball game between the 5th graders. Nothing like sitting in the heat of the day watching a bunch of kidz kick a ball. Yippeee! (having to cheer while sitting in a hotter than Hades spot took much skill on Mom's part let me tell ya...) Met with Noni's teacher for the end-of-the-year conference.

Then on Friday we had Noni's Field Day! Again, I say Yippeee!! Went to the school and Noni's class was getting their faces painted. This was the FIRST activity. Upon completion of the face painting Noni began asking if we could "just go home." Seems the heat and gnats were getting to Her Royal Highness. Told her no and then got to watch her do a multitude of other wonderful activities.

I had to leave and go to the playground for a while so I could contain Nathan in one spot. Nanny got to stay and watch the fun while he had a slide or two.

Friday Night we had to return to the school for another exciting round of kickball. This time it was the 5th grade versus the faculty. It was kind of fun....well, a little bit. One thing that was hilarious was the faculty kept "cheating" seriously. (no, that's not the funny part, just keep reading...) They would let their best kickers keep on kicking. The ones that couldn't kick didn't have to. Great way to teach the kidz about fair play, huh? One of the faculty has a piss poor attitude. When some of the parents were saying to the faculty, "Y'all are cheating" she (a teacher) got really upset and said they were being a bunch of babies. Her payback? She tripped over first base and got a really nasty scrape. The parents' retort? "CHEATERS NEVER WIN!!" They called the game due to this "horrendous" injury.

Saturday was kind of laid back. Sunday morning, sheer madness as I tried to get three kidz ready to go to church. After church we went to my sister's house for a cookout. That was cool. Only bad thing? I had, what I call, an insomnia weekend. So, I was really tired and we left early so I could come home and sleep. And sleep I did!!

Monday, Tuesday, cleaned house which I absolutely HATE. And then today. Had to be at school at 8:00am for Nicklaus' transition meeting. The meeting is where I found out what will be done for him in middle school to accommodate his processing disorder, (you know, he keeps the information in his head but can't get it on paper?) I was pleased they had the results of his IQ test and commented on how high it was. Sometimes people with certain disabilities are thought to be stupid, but they are actually really, really smart. My kid is one of those. Anyway, I am happy with the results and I am through with school until next week when they have the Parent's Luncheon for 5th grade Awards/Honor Day on Thursday and a repeat on Friday for the Kindergarten through 4th grades. Thank God FRIDAY IS THE LAST DAY OF SCHOOL!!!

Maybe I didn't clarify the Friday Night Kickball Game Episode enough judging by my first comment. It was NOT a child that fell, it was one of the faculty. One that kept kicking and kicking and kicking because she was a good kicker. I also stated she had a piss poor attitude....and her payback? She fell and hurt her knee. That is when the parents' who'd been upset all along because of the faculty's cheating said "Cheaters Never Win."

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It's Great To Save!

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

I love shopping online. I hate going to the mall to find items I need. I prefer sitting at home and browsing my favorite stores. Another thing I love is finding a great coupon site that offers ways to save I could never find at a "brick and mortar" store. One of my favorite online merchants is Overstock.com and I love it when I can find Overstock.com Coupons. The site already has really low prices and when you add a coupon to the deal you are really getting a bargain. CouponChief.com has over 1,000 stores listed on their site and they have recently made their coupons easier to scan and have added "how to" screencasts for a lot of their major stores such as: Target, Gap, Home Depot, and many more. If you are going to shop online, you owe to yourself and your wallet to check this site out!!


Weird News and Stuff.....

While surfing around the Internet I learned a lot of things. What kind of things you ask? (Well, even if you didn't ask, I am soooo gonna tell you!) Just click on the red links to find out the rest of the story!!<br>

It may be in your best interest to NOT rob a bank in high falutin' style. Sometimes it's okay to be a plain Jane...this is one of those times.

If you live in Illinois don't worry about being able to walk, talk or drive, you are still entitled to carry a gun.

Idiots are NEVER allowed to "chase the rainbow." Just say NO to sweets if you only have 1/2 of a brain!!

Y'all can believe what you want, I KNOW where Livey was on May 12, 2007.

Otis (of Andy Griffith Show fame) is alive and well. He moved to New Zealand after the show ended.

Okay, suppose you just robbed a bank. This does not signify that it is now Miller Time.



Hair Today....Gone Tomorrow....

While grilling out, or barbecuing as you Yankees call it, on Mother's Day the topic of conversation turned to those who are follicly challenged, i.e. bald or getting there. Joey is knocking on the "I'm never taking my hat off again" door. He's mentioned trying Rogaine Foam. However, we found out that majority of the time if you start using Rogaine you can never stop. So, his next step? He's talking about getting a Hair transplant. Oy Vey!!!



It Pays To Advertise!!

Some of you may recall I posted a banner like this on my blog not too long ago for In The Motherhood a new web series starring Leah Remini. I received an e-mail from Nikki at the production company stating I may be interested in the contest and asking me to post a banner on my web site/blog. This is what I received in the mail for doing so....pretty cool, huh? I thought so!!!



You Can't Depend On Social Security

That is a fact. We hear it on the news all the time. I've found a novel way to not depend on Social Security. You really should learn about utango rewards program. The concept behind uTANGO is that most consumers need some, okay, A LOT of help saving for their future and uTANGO allows it’s members to power their everyday spending and garner rewards for their future via their long term faithfulness and their personal triumphs!

The only catch? Members must eventually marry, remain faithful to uTANGO merchants and stay married in order to reap their Life-Stage Cash Rewards. By joining uTango you will find a place to shop, make wedding plans, seek expert advice on a multitude of topics (relationships, kids, finances, etc...you’ll and earn rewards for life! To find out more, you can visit How It Works .

It's also important to mention that Membership in Utango is 100% FREE!! The merchants that Utango offers are pretty cool too. I already buy books online a lot, now I can accrue rewards for the future by purchasing my books at Barnes and Noble! I'm already shopping there, why not get a little extra out of it? Another store I really like to shop at, because the have awesome online sales is Toys R Us. I try to buy things, toys and such, a little all year long and I'm not so overwhelmed when Christmas rolls around. This is a necessity if you have 3 kidz. Heck, when I only had one child it helped out immensely! Yep...they are on the list also!! So, take a look around the site, you'll see tons of merchants you use all the time anyway. Join Utango and you'll be getting more than just the merchandise....you'll get a little or a lot extra for your future as well!! You won't find another program that rewards customer loyalty so much and is soooo easy to use!!


I Cannot Fight Them Any Longer....

Sure, they look all innocent and such. Most terrorists do. I have tried not to succumb to their brainwashing tactics. However, it is impossible. They have worn down any resistance I may have. I give up. I have taken my place as leader amongst the terrorists, aka Nicklaus, Noni and Nathan. The constant yelling, whining and crying, albeit all mine, has taken it's toll. I will hereinafter be known as Al-El-MomisNutz. This post may also be entitled either a) How to make your three year old scared of Mommy, or b) I have Wayyyyy toooo much time on my hands.

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Wanna Date A Star?

In the first online game show of it's kind, the contestant, you, can submit Free videos at GoFish.com for the chance of winning a date with super hot celeb Mirelly Taylor. Mirelly Taylor has starred in movies such as Kiss Me Again and Serving Sara and on the small screen on shows like Punk'd, Numb3rs and Las Vegas. Emmy Award Winning Producer, Scott Sternberg, and Andrew Firestone from “The Bachelor” are also involved in the production of the show! The online audience also gets in on the fun because we can vote as to which user submitted video we like the best! Go and peruse the selection they have. I may be cliche' but my online favorite is the Top choice right now. Submitted by DentonRose - Intro to a Stud Muffin is spectacular. This Hunk-a-Hunk a-Burning Trailer Trash Love is gonna be a tough one to beat. His video is awesome to say the least. He's got a cartoon character, totally cool music, and he's dressed like a poor imitation of Elvis!! What more could a girl want? But, you do have the opportunity to try and beat the Denster. All filmed on location in his garage as he takes you through his ahem....workout schedule! All you have to do is submit your video, the more you submit, the better your chance of winning! I mean, c'mon, how many times in life are you invited to seduce a celeb. I mean, you actually have a chance of winning a date with this babe! The only way to know if you've got what it takes is to try...so go try!!!



Congratulations Graphics

This very handsome young man is my nephew Phillip in Ohio....why is he wearing a crown?? BECAUSE HE WAS THE PROM KING, HONEY...DAMN...GOOD LOOKS RUN IN MY FAMILY HUH? He also kicks ass on the football field...yeah...he got that from me too...LOL

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He was sooooo excited to get 10 dollars and a card for his good grades from his Aunt Livey!! You would have thought it was a million!! We will be calling later to thank you via telephone, he wanted to call you at 6:30 am this morning, but I informed him that mornings and Aunt Livey are not a good match so we will wait until later this afternoon!!!

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Hey You!!!

It has been a hectic, hectic week...I will blog later this evening and catch all of you up on the NUTZ household!! Gee...bet you can't wait, huh?



Relax and Unwind

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Large stately houses line the streets in downtown Savannh. The huge testaments to the wealth of the first inhabitants of Savannah are truly a site to behold. There are a few that are still used as a primary home for a family. Quite a few operate as a Bed and Breakfast. We only live about 45 minutes from downtown Savannah but I would love to be able to afford to stay in one of these inns for a weekend. Maybe one day we can go and stay for a pseudo-second honeymoon...we didn't even have a first one.



Well, I guess I should have typed this last month, but I missed it entirely. However, it doesn't matter, you can still help year round. According to the Cure Autism Now web page autism is characterized by the following things:

Autism is a complex neurobiological disorder of development that lasts throughout a person's lifetime. Because persons with autism exhibit different symptoms or behaviors, ranging from mild to serious, autism is a "spectrum" disorder, or a group of disorders with a range of similar features.

Children with autism have difficulty communicating and interacting with others. Many individuals with autism seem to retreat into isolation , or fixate on a word, an object, or an activity.

Sometimes symptoms are seen in infancy, while other children develop normally for a year or more before they begin to slip into their own private world. At best, a high functioning person with autism may simply seem eccentric, a loner. At worst, a person with more profound autism may never learn to speak or care for themselves.

You are never prepared for a child with autism. You will gradually come to believe it, but never fully accept it, get used to it, or get over it. You put away the hopes and dreams you had for that child - the high school graduation, the June wedding. Small victories are cause for celebration - a word mastered, a dry bed, a hug given freely.

My buddy Maeve understands this all too well. Her son, Pudd'n (aka Cutie Pie) has autism. One day she had a healthy, happy baby and the next her whole world came tumbling down. They will have a cure one day, please try to donate as much or as little as you can. With a child being diagnosed with Autism every 21 minutes it will most likely hit you close to home before you know it. Let's fight this illness, k? If you'd like to post something similar on your blog, just copy my graphics, my words whatever. And give what your heart tells you, you may be helping Maeve get her happy, healthy, well-adjusted child back.



Bird Watching

Joey has this habit these days. He has one of our outside folding chairs set up by the chicken pen. He likes to go out there and sit and watch them. Nope, I don't understand the entertainment value in that, but hey, to each his own. Some husbands play poker at a certain time every week, some join bowling leagues, some use spare time to get some yardwork done. My husband? He's a chicken watcher....


I Don't Understand...

I checked Google for my page rank prediction before they ran it the last time. I had a PR of 5 and the site said it was going to stay that way. It didn't....went down to a 4. I hate it...there went my really high paying opps from PayPerPost. Can anyone explain in "gee I'm a dummy about this Google Thing" terms how you raise your score and when they update again? I've tried Googling and every thing else and if I do find a page that explains it the page could be written in Swahili, I can't understand a word of it. Thanks!



Have A Business Finance Situation?

Many times a person will fulfill a life-long dream of becoming a business owner only to have it spiral out of control because the financial end of things are not being taking care of properly. And if you've ever looked at bookkeeping pricing the prices go through the roof. If this sounds like you, then maybe you should visit Accounting Paradise.com. They offer top notch services for all your accounting needs. What sets them apart from other companies? Why should you choose them, well just click Here and your questions will be answered. Accounting Paradise truly goes the extra mile for their clients. Their top notch when it comes to dealing with bookkeeping task one encounters in the workplace. They also have a 20% discount if you need to purchase Quicken online. So, get rid of that money headache today, hand it over to experts in the accounting field, and enjoy being a business owner for once.


A Funny E-mail From My Niece

I got this in e-mail from my niece and I just had to share it. The sad thing is that's this "joke" is really more of a fact sharing monologue. Yep, it's all true and it's just a downright shame that most Southerners (myself included) have seen it, accept it as normal and understand it completely. (Items written after asterik are just my take on things.

The North and South

The North has Bloomingdale's, the South has Dollar General.
(*I loves me some Dollar General, super cheap name-brand cleaning
supplies, I buy tons and never clean my house, well sometimes*)

The North has coffee houses, the South has Waffle Houses.
(*Nasty, we never eat at the Waffle House, however
we do visit the Huddle House from time to time*)

The North has dating services, the South has family reunions.
(*When I was in high school I went out with a guy named Chris, once, why? Because I learned the next day from my dad that we were 2nd cousins. Chris and I decided rather quickly that we weren't right for each other. Yeah, I know there's no "shared" blood, but it's still gross* )

The North has switchblade knives; the South has Lee Press-on Nails.
(*I prefer Revlon myself*)

The North has double last names; the South has double first names.
(*Noni has a little girl in her class named "Sammi Jo"
I personally know a Linda Gail, Betty Jo,
Mary Ann, Mary Alice ,Billy Ray and Bessie May*)

The North has Indy car races; The South has stock car races.
(*Is that what you call Nascar?*)

Tne North has Cream of Wheat, the South has grits.
(*and we use WATER to cook them, not MILK...
Milk in grits, that's just uncalled for!!*)

The North has green salads, the South has collard greens.
(*Now this one I find hilarious. Why? Because I eat just
collard greens (with pepper vinegar all the time.
In fact, I was talking on the phone to Livey and
told her I'd just eaten me a batch.*)

The North has lobsters, the South has crawfish.
(We have lobsters, they fly them in everyday,
but crawfish are mighty tasty as well)

The North has the rust belt; the South has the Bible Belt.
( *yep, within a 10 mile radius in my teeny tiny town,
population 1,176,there's 30+ churches, all with
witty sayings on their signs)


In the South: --If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic.
Four men in a four-wheel drive pickup truck with a tow
chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them,
just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.
(*it's happened to me several times, Thank God for
huge 4 wheel drive, rebel flag waving trucks, redneck men!!*)

Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store....
do not buy food at this store.
(*Now this is too funny, there's a store like that about 3 miles from our house and besides the aforementioned items they sell pizza and chicken* "Yes, I'll take a tub of them night crawlers and a slice of pepporoni pizza to go)

Remember, "Y'all" is singular, "all y'all" is plural, and "all y'all's" is plural possessive

Get used to hearing "You ain't from round here, are ya?"
(*many of us will ask you this after you've just spoken one word.
We're just smart like that.*)

Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later on how to use it.
(*It will be used to season vegtables and other things ,
my mom told me once that bacon grease is what
she used to fry pork shops and such when she was first married
and money was scarce. They ate them everyday.*)

Don't be worried at not understanding what
people are saying. They can't understand you either.
(*get ready to hear, "Do What?" Which means translation please.*)

The first Southern statement to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective "big'ol," truck or "big'ol" boy
(*but don't think we won't still know you a Yankee*)

Most Northerners begin their Southern-influenced dialect this way. All of them are in denial about it. The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.!
(*don't ever deny your country side...embrace it!!*)

Be advised that "He needed killin." is a valid defense here.
(*You have just got to click HERE and read that song.*)

If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all watch this,"
you should stay out of the way. These are likely to
be the last words he'll ever say.

(*and then the idiots will be pouring blood,
unable to move an arm or leg
and protest they don't need to go to
a doctor. This becomes "damn doctor,"as in not going to,"
if you've told them they need to get looked at over 2 times*)<br>

If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the smallest accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It doesn't matter whether you need anything or not. You just have to go there.

(*we actually had snow here a couple of years back...
about an inch, the malls closed for this "blizzard"*)

Do not be surprised to find that 10-year olds own their own shotguns, they are proficient marksmen, and their mammas taught them how to aim.

(*I've given him a few pointers. There's nothing better
than skeet shooting , to Nicklaus (click skeet shooting
if you don't know what the heck skeets are , oh wait,
click HERE maybe there is one thing he enjoys more.* )
In the South, we have found that the best way to
grow a lush green lawn is to pour gravel on it and
call it a driveway. We've already discussed this, unfortunately
that will do nothing for the 6+ acres that's so not lush
and can't be mowed without a riding lawnmore or bushhog

(* We've already discussed the driveway thing.
Wonder if we should just gravel the "lawn" also, oyster shells
are used a lot her for driveways and such..*
You keep the shells after your oyster roast*)(br)(Br)


If you do settle in the South and bear children,
don't think we will accept them as Southerners.

After all, if the cat had kittens in the oven,
we wouldn't call 'em biscuits.

(oh no honey, your lineage must be connected to someone in the
Civil War to qualify as Truly Southren.


The Importance of Genes, Heredity and the Like To Me...

I've written before that I was adopted. My parents went through a lawyer for a private adoption, paid for my birth mother's doctors bills and necessary items and then picked me up from the hospital when I was only one day old. Sure, I'm curious as to who actually gave birth to me, but I'd never be overwhelmed if I met my birth family. No boo-hoos and exclamations of "I've found my family" like on those reunion talk shows. Why? Because I have a family, one I love dearly and they love me. I don't need another set of parents, another sister or nephews and nieces. I have them all and am quite satisfied. A lot of people I've known forever don't even know I'm adopted. I am like my dad in so many ways. Which leads me to the belief that shared DNA does not a family make. I may not share one drop of common blood with anyone that is in my real family, but it doesn't matter one way or the other. Shared genes is not something that must be present for a person to "fit" in with his/her relatives. Love, on the other hand, is vitally important and I received, (and still do) tons of that!!!



Hey...You, Yeah You, Could You Answer This Please??

You don't have to register, sign up, sign in or enter any information...just click the button that is your answer and that's it!!! I'm just curious as to how many of you do. I am pretty sure there are quite a few readers that don't comment, so I don't know you've been here. I'm just curious as to how many people my freebies posts actually bring to my ol' Internet stompin' grounds!!

Create polls and vote for free. dPolls.com



It Doesn't Get Much More Hick Than This....

Woohee....forget watching that bug zapper and calling it entertainment....we've upped the redneck factor in my household by a million. You'd think that be hard to do. But wait, let me show you what my kids do for enjoymentAll of them barefoot as yard dogs and wranglin' them up some chickens!! Nathan even completes the trailer park trash ensemble by wearing only his pull up!! Can you say Yeehaw?

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

And of course, since I am terrified of birds I was telling them the whole time to put them down they were gonna peck their eyes out any second...

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I will Get It...

By it" I mean new home furniture one day! I know I've previously said I was satisfied with the den and living room furniture, that was before I saw the nice drawings Nathan did on the couch in the den. So, now I want bedroom furniture, a new dining room table and a new couch. I have no idea how long I will have to scrub to get the pen marks out of our "semi" new one, but I have a feeling it won't matter, the marks will remain!!


When You Wish Upon A Star.....

Friday, May 11, 2007

Okay, so it may technically be Saturday where I live but I got the Freebies done!! Hope you like this longer list, (tried to make up for last week's totally sucky one!!) I hope you find lots you can use!!

Tinkerbell Glitters

Tinkerbell Glittersfree glitter text and family website at FamilyLobby.com

Free Mothers Day Gift from VocalPoint - Limited to first 50,000

coupon and free sample AVEENO POSITIVELY AGELESS
Free 4 pound bag of Iams

Motorcycle Stunt Rider DVD

Free samples snore MD

Skin Care sample

Free sample oven roasted beef jerky crisps from Oberto

Free Sample of Airborne On-The-Go

Free sample Noxzema Blackhead Cleanser

FREE Dove Cool Moisture Shampoo & Conditioner

Free Mechanical Pencil


Quaker® Granola Bites

Free John Frieda Custom Color Collection



Click Here For Any Of The Following, go to site,

if in stock,add to your cart -100% Free

**Building Blocks Sing Along Music CD
**Know Kit Cards(For 3- to 4-year-olds)

**Spanish-Language Materials

(Spanish-language versions of the Family Guide,

Activity Book, and Coloring Book )
**Know Kit Cards(For 5- to 6-year-olds)
**Character Cards

Join the Big Comfy Couch Club - free stickers, coloring pages, etc...

FREE LYSOL® Healthy Habits Activity Booklet for Kids

Printable Alvin & The Chipmunks

Print -N - Play (paper toys that you print and play with)



Tired of The Same Old, Same Old In The Dating Scene?

Single? Tired of sites that just seem like meat markets? Want to meet some truly witty singles? Then you should try "It's Just Coffee.com." The site promises to have slews of witty braniacs and nerds just waiting for their Mr. or Ms. Right!! They promise to be open, honest and not just after your body, they want a brain attached, thank you! Give it a shot! You just may find another Einstein searching for his Madame Curie!!



The other night we were sitting here and Justin (the kid we've adopted or aka my 17 year old lover according my batty sister in law) called. He and the idiot's (sister in law of parking ticket shame) son had exchanged some words, argued, via cell phone. He called Joey and was telling him about it. We thought nothing more of it. A kid's argument. No fight ensued, just two boys yelling at one another. Well, the idiot's son went home and told Mommy all about it. I had already went to sleep for the night and did not hear of this until the next day. Seems the idiot called the other sister in law (not my fave on in Ohio) the one that lives about 2.5 hours away from us. She, of course, was in a tizzy over stupid shit...again. She got the other sister to call Joey, she, the idiot could not, because she is not speaking to us. The other sister calls to find out what is going on. WHY??? It's a kid's argument...let it go. The idiot however cannot do this. Joey told the other sister that it all started with the infamous HOOTERS episode. Joey let the semi-rational sister know that I did NOT tell anything about Hooters to get anyone in trouble, we were just having a conversation and I mentioned it. I never dreamed it would start WW3. The semi-rational sister says, "I know Joey...but you know how G***** is! To her that's a strip club." At least someone else knows she's a bit off. My point is, why in the hell does it get all this started? Long distance phone calls over an argument between two kids? Just another classic example of how she gets her panties in a wad over the most stupid shit imaginable. I bet you she is still "upset" over it today. I am so sick of this family...I swear. Since day one they have made me feel like I am not "ONE" of them (thank GOD I am not) and are quite obvious in subtle and not so subtle ways. When we get invitations and such from my sis-in-law in Ohio, they always have "To Uncle Joey & Aunt Kellie and kids" or the like. Whenever we get anything from the others? Always just addressed to "Uncle Joey," I don't know, maybe they just irk the hell out of me and I take too much personally, but they've never acted like I am in "their" family and they never will. So, anything that they have coming up, a high school graduation for one, if Uncle Joey wants to hightail it to that, so be it. I will not be made to feel like I have in the past anymore. How much fun would that be? Sitting next to the idiot, who's puffed up like a bullfrog, pissed at me? NONE, so I won't go....there is a better chance of me walking to Ohio and attending the graduation of MY nephew there, the one that acknowledges I am actually a part of HIS family!! I will no longer try my best to be a part of this family, that so obviously, does NOT want me. I've done all I can....it ain't happening anymore.



Menopause A to Z

My mom started her "change of life" rather early and sometimes I think I may be following in her footsteps. I have found a site that may have a lot of answers, one article I found helpful was Early Signs of Menopause. The site is called, Menopause A to Z and has alot of information available on everything menopause related, one section many will find helpful is menopause relief. I guess I am different from most women, while I don't look forward to the sweating and all, it won't bother me for "that" aspect of my life to be over. I can't have any more children, unless I find another man, which is way too much trouble, so I will be content with the three I have and not fear the next step in "womanhood."



Yep..that's a pic hubby took of a chicken. Cock-a-doodle doo!! If you want to see how really country my life is...I will post about it later. However, it's day 2 of Field Day and now I am doomed to a repeat of yesterday! How much fun is that? Bet you're all jealous. It's such a great time watching a bunch of children, only one being mine, argue about who dropped a ball, who didn't run fast enough. I heard a teacher tell them to get along and love one another yesterday. Yep, in a perfect world it would be like that, however, children can be the cruelest creatures on earth. Hell, why would they wanna offer encouragement to one another when they can just slam on each other instead? There are however 2 little boys that will NOT be telling my son that he didn't do something fast enough again. No, I did not harm them....just politely told them that "Nicklaus got 2 people out in kickball, how many did you get? None? Seems like he moved faster than you then, huh?" Nicklaus got his turn riding some thing with wheels then. What, I shouldn't have said anything? Nicklaus is the type he would have sat there and just let them do whatever they want, have a thousand turns even though he really wanted his. He didn't speak up, so I, as his very protective (okay....one might say overprotective) momma did. I've never been known for my talent of remaining quiet. He did tell me that I cannot do that in middle school next year, (yeah? watch me if they don't treat you right...) Oh yeah...we have another in-law saga segment also...I'll be back.

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I Guess I'm Getting Older...

It seems like my skin is constantly changing. I'm sure I'm getting those "fine" lines that you hear about constantly. But, they are not really noticeable as of yet. My problem seems to be my skin is constantly changing. One day oily, the next dry. I keep breaking out and nothing I use seems to help, just makes it worse. I've been looking into the skinceuticals line of products and am thinking of giving them a try very soon. The line promises that their products are made with pharmaceutical grade ingredients and then they are mixed together. The site says that they are the best serums and lotions in the industry. It's worth a try to get my skin back in order again.


A Little Fun At The Nutz Household

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Yep...this started out as being "an underwear model" that is what Nathan called it...and then they all joined in...doing God only knows what sort of modeling...Heaven help us....how 'bout them muscles on that youngin'?



Customer Relationship Software

Let's be realistic, you're in business to earn money, right? So why would you want to waste valuable time having to learn intricate software programs when really all you want to do is generate sales? Well, you need to check out this crm software. AIM Promote promises your business a lower cost of implementation AND a lower cost of TOTAL ownership. How could you lose? They also offer a FREE 14-Day trial membership. You'll learn this system quicker than a wink and you'll have a handle on lead management in no time! If at any time you have questions, you will be able to contact a highly trained support staff via E-mail, toll free telephone call or via their brand NEW support forum. This is simply a win-win situation for you, your sales representatives and your company!



Nathan decided the Slip-N-Slide wasn't quite slippin' and slidin' enough, so he figured more liquid may help it out. Lord help us. (**yes, those are stumps in the background. They have been here since we moved in. Hubby is going to take care of them "in a minute.")

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Tag...I'm It....

The Lovely Wanda (AKA Wander) tagged me with this little meme. So....here goes:

Here are the rules:

1. Add a direct link to your post below the name of the person who tagged you. Include the state and country you’re in.

2. List out your top 5 favorite places to eat at your location (locally).

3. Tag 5 other people (preferably from other countries/states) and let them know they’ve been tagged.

Well, since I live in Brooklet, Georgia ( population 1,176- Got you beat Wander) and we've only got one restaurant. The first one will be my LOCAL restaurant. The next 4 will be available in the next BIG town of Statesboro, Population - 32135!

1) Stilson Cafe - they have the best burgers and chicken fingers anywhere! And my whole family can get cheeseburgers (this includes 2 double ones, one for Joey and one for Nicklaus) with fries or tater logs and drinks for around $21.00!!

2) El Sombrero - Yummy Mexican Food!!

3) Nikko-Actually only Noni and I love this place. Japanese food!! Sushi for Mommy!!

4) IHOP - I know...not original...but I loves me some pancakes!

5) Longhorn - granted it's a chain restaurant, but it's awesome and they make one helluva margarita!! (since we're poor...this is our "splurge" place)

I don't know who to tag...let me think...Okay:

Latte Man
Sour Patch Baby-MOMMY 2 HIM

Let me know if you did it...k?



Why I Love PPP!!

Hey, I know I wrote a post not too long ago about why I love Pay Per Post and welcome their opportunity to make money blogging!! That was an unsolicited testimony....this one is one in which they wanted me to write why I love them. Same reasons!! I've made about $650.00 and I've only been doing it seriously ( 2 posts a day) for about 2 months! I've used the money to buy all kinds of cool stuff - a metal detector, foreign coins for Nicklaus, a memory card for PS2 and some other stuff. However, the number one thing I've bought has been groceries for the house!! With Hubby's work going so slow, this money has really helped out! I just love getting my email everyday and seeing that my PayPal account has been increased, several times!!! Y'all should sign up...it's awesome.


Okay...so, here's my day...

Nanny and Poppy are coming to pick us (me and the Natester) up (since I have no car) so, we can get to Nicklaus' and Noni's school by 8:30 am. Watch Nicklaus participate in Field Day activities until 11:25 am. At 11:25 am head to Noni's class for meeting with her teacher. After meeting, watch more Field Day activities (lucky, lucky me, woohoo...the wet sponge relay) as I am watching Field Day activities, wait for cell phone to ring so I can rush back home for dishwasher repair man. Oh yeah, and in the midst of all this joyous activity, keep a hold of Nathan who will be running around like a chicken with his head cut off. Oh yeah...minus the meeting, tomorrow will be a repeat for Noni's Field Day.



Dear Reproductive Fairy...or Whomever is in Charge...

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

I just thought you should know, since apparently it slipped through your communication channels that the hubster is clipped, tipped and tucked. Spayed or neutered, however you would like to look at it. Thus, you may inform Auntie Flo that her prescence is not needed in the Nutz household anymore. Her arrival is not met with "OH THANK GOD" anymore. In fact, it's just met with "OH DAMN, NOT AGAIN," and lots of chocolate, Tylenol PM and wine. Thank you.




I was going through a drawer in my kitchen earlier and dear Lord....where did I end up with all these imprinted pens ? Granted, I understand the ones from the bank, various restaurants and even building supply stores. But, c'mon, where did I, of ALL people, get one from a Certified Personal Trainer and Yoga Instructor? The only training I've done lately, or ever, is potty training.



The inhumanity of it all...I cannot believe what I was forced to do, just this morning. I, yes I, had to wash dishes. I would rather get a shot in my arm than place my hands in a sink full of water and suds and scrub pots and pans. I had to hand wash dishes all my life until 8 months ago when we moved into our new house and it had a dishwasher....alas, at some point during it's wash cycle last evening, it died. However, it is still under warranty so, we will use paper plates tonight and tomorrow the Whirlpool Dishwasher Man will be here to fix it. And I should have, what I call "my little gift from God" you may refer to it simply as a dishwasher I suppose, repaired.



A New Bug Movie!!!

I absolutely love horror movies and it's been a while since there has been a good one put out by Hollywood. You have got to check out the trailer for this new bug movie put out by LionsGate! You can find the trailer here! I just know this is going to be one of those movies that have you itching from the get go. I can just imagine bugs and I start itching!! I really like the posters for the new bug movie, BUG as well. I like this one because, it's well, creepy:

And this one because I love Ashley Judd!!

Both posters say, "First they send in their drone...Then they find their Queen." Could you get any more creepy crawly? Imagine, you're just lying at home one evening and suddenly you're chosen as "THE ONE," and overtaken by a legion of bugs??? UGH!! And with the director of the Excorcist in charge of this movie you know the special effects are going to be out of this world. Plus, in the Excorcist part of the scream factor was due to how the camera was positioned and such, I can only imagine how many times I'll jump out of the seat watching this one!! I know I will be totally convinced I am a colony for some godforsaken insect species after watching this movie...but watch it I will!!! The movie is due in theaters May 25, 2007 and has promised to be one of the most disturbing horror movies ever! If the trailer is any indication...I have to say I agree!!



Tuesday, May 08, 2007

I would never trade my kidz and yes, even my husband for anything in the world. (Ask me when I'm pissed at him-I will have another answer though, I may for the kidz as well) Anyway, did you ever have a moment (or moments) where you just reach a point and say, "Is this my life?" I usually reach this point when I realize that finding a terrific deal on pork loins at the IGA was the high point of my week. I mean, when I was a little girl and I imagined my life as a grown-up somehow I don't remember getting cuts of a dead pig playing into any fantasy I had.



Why Does My Husband Like Holding His Cock So Much???

Okay...okay...so technically it's a hen....but it was a helluva title, one I couldn't pass up.

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UGH...I need some new things in my kitchen

Mainly I want new cookware. I hate mine. Of course I have the kind with Teflon or whatever. Which translates into, NO METAL UTENSILS OF ANY KIND, may be used while cooking in this set. Which, of course translates into, at least in my house....husband uses metal spatulas to cook eggs, then uses metal spoons to take eggs out of pan. If he cooks in a pot? Yep, you guessed it....has to use a metal spoon.


Help Needed!!

Hey...I have a sorta strange post I guess. But, it could be beneficial to you. If you, or anyone you know, is close enough to Hardeville, SC (it's only like 20-30 minutes from Savannah) and is an experienced painter (as in buildings, not pictures) then I have someone who REALLY needs workers. The pay is good, full benefits after 90 days and it's a nationwide company. If you do know of someone, or want more information, then send me an email at: momisnutz@earthlink.net and I will forward the information to you!! This is a legitimate job opportunity. A member of my family is scrambling for help, the painting needs to be done...and there aren't enough painters!!!



I quit...

worrying about what my house looks like...I have 3 kidz and no desire to be Martha Stewart...so it looks like hell....but we're happy.

I quit....worrying about what other people think.....I don't care...really I never have....

I quit....trying to get my kidz to get along....I guess, having no experience in this matter personally, my sister got married when I was 6...so I didn't have "sibling" rivalry,...anyway...I assume it is normal for an 11 year old and a 5 year old to hate one another?

And finally, I pose a question. Why is if someone visits my home and my husband's socks (several pairs) are left wherever he took them off, and the kidz' clothes are pretty much the same thing... these same people enter my home right after my family has eaten dinner and the mess is not yet cleaned up. The floor is kinda messed up because my family refuses to wipe their feet. Yet not ONE of my belongings is strown about, WHY is this a reflection on me? I am not a good housekeeper because I do not follow them about with hampers, vacuums, mops, dustcloths and sponges. WHY DOES THIS MAKE ME A HORRIBLE HOUSEKEEPER? Excuse me, I will stop any form of life that I do have and devote my life to cleaning. I don't care that maybe I may like to sleep occasionally, maybe get on the computer, maybe, just maybe read something once in a while. To hell with it. I will now become a 24-7 cleaning machine. That will be my life.

Nah....I'll just go to my number one choice....saying screw you to anyone that says stuff like this...and QUIT caring that they say it.