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Well...

Saturday, March 10, 2007


We just went to Wally World and had to buy Noni some shoes and tights for church tomorrow. Yep...I'll be in church every Sunday now....moved back in with the parents and there is no option. It will be good for me and the kids I know. I just feel so powerless right now. I have literally no say so at all in how my life is going. The kidz and I are living out of garbage bags. Dear God, please...if you have it in you...click the donate button over there....I am going to bug the hell out of the lady that works in assisting people in my situation find a place to live...if I have the help with deposits and stuff, I know we'll make it and my kids will be much better for it. They need to see mom in control of her life again. On another note, Noni has cried off and on all day for her daddy. SHe says she knows we had to leave, momma couldn't take being talked to that way anymore, but she misses her daddy. So, I broke down and let her call him. I know we have a court order, but I wasn't talking to him, even though it killed me not to, anyway, he cried his eyes out, told her how much he loved and missed her and said that he couldn't talk to her, there was a court order and "mommy just made it all worse." I've threatened and threatened this over the last years and finally did it. I honestly don't think he thought I ever would. I just don't know what to do....he has never hit me, it has just been years of verbal and mental and it did seem to be escalating to physical with Nick...inappropriate spankings, he didn't beat him or anything, but I feel the spankings were bad enough. I don't know, I am just one confused Momma.....

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