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Love is blind. Marriage is the eye-opener

Monday, August 01, 2005

As mentioned in a previous post, my hubby hates Wal-Mart. A full scale battle plan is drawn when I want him to go instead of me. An intervention, if you will. First I tell him, "Honey, we need diapers." This usually does not impress upon him that he should say, "Yes, dear, let me get my keys." Usually I think of some fishing do-dad that he may want and tell him that he should go pick it up. He'll say, "Naw, I can wait." But, see, I've planted the seed, and after an hour or so, he'll come to me and say, "okay, make a damn list, I'll go to Wal-Mart, I hate Wal-Mart." "I know dear, let me find a pen." So, yesterday, he finally gives in and treks to Wal-Mart, with his list. He calls about 3 times asking where in the hell is ___? (Insert product here.) The final call is when he is in the checkout line. The phone rings, I answer, "What now?" To which I get the following monologue:
"I hate Wal-Mart
I hate everyone in Wal-Mart
The people who work at Wal-Mart are dumbasses
and rude.
I wish everyone in Wal-Mart would die.
I am never coming to Wal-Mart again.
And I don't care that the checkout girl just heard every word I said."
"Yes dear, love you, hurry home!"
I love my husband.
He loves me.
He hates Wal-Mart.