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What the hell do ya say to that?

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Since we live in the boonies I'm used to having a legion of small black ants, we call them "sugar ants" some refer to them as "pissants." When I read that, I kinda like pissant better, because the piss me right the hell off. These creatures are harder than out of town guests to get rid of. I've tried everything, sprays, traps, grits (supposedly they eat them and blow up, much like sea gulls and Alka-Seltzer, I guess) and the little pests just change their entry point. Well, I woke up this morning and went to the bathroom. I saw some sort of small mound of black ants, upon closer inspection I saw that a small piece of cheese had been put on the windowsill. I looked around and yep, the bathtub had one as well. I went and asked Noni, and I knew the chances of it not being her putting it in there were slim to none, "Why did you put cheese all over the dang bathroom??" Her reply, "I didn't want the ants to get hungry." Oh hell, I had to come in here and gather the cheese and ants up in a wad of toilet paper and she followed. "Mommy, what are you doing???" I looked at her and said, "You know how those people call us all the time for vacations? Well, these little ants have just won a cruise...say Bon Voyage!!" (flush) She was not traumatized, she just asked me how I knew they could swim. "Easy I told her, there are plenty of lifeguards."