GIT-R-DONE
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK A REDNECK MAN FOR!!
Me: Honey, please move that damn monstrosity in the yard. It's falling apart, It's too damn heavy to lift. Get rid of it.
Hubby: I told you not to buy that dang thing. I hated it when you got it. You had to put damn 20 tons of sand in the legs. Oh, but now it's fallen all to hell and back, it's "Honey, get rid of it!" One day you're gonna listen to me. I tell you not to get this stupid crap, but hell no.....(grumble, grumble....and more unintelligible grumbling)
Me: Love ya honey....thanks dear...(hmmpf..., if I listened to the things you said not to buy, we'd have nothing but guns, bullets and deer hunting shit...)
Hubby: What????
Me: I said thanks, your a special guy. I'll try not to buy any more shit...
I roll eyes and go back inside to check the roast I have on for dinner. Then I hear some kinda motor or something cranking up. VROOOMMM....WHIRRRRR...RUHUNNNNNN..RUHUNNNNN........
I know without a doubt what is happening. We are talking about the man that took our couch, yes couch, out into the side yard when we finally got another one and burned it. Yep, burned it. Anyway....I can only post the following to show you what happened to the crap in the yard.
Hell, least it's gone!! Forget the roast. Grab them marshmallows and wieners kidz...daddy's lighting another fire soon. Maeve, I tried to get the "youngins" to run around that there fahr a few times for ya and say,
"Double, double toil and trouble;
"Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn, and caldron bubble.
Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the caldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting,
Lizard's leg, and owlet's wing,—
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn, and caldron bubble.
They all looked at me like I was crazy....Shakespeare was not crazy....well, he wasn't formally diagnosed. BWAHAHAHAHAHA
And before everyone tells me how dangerous it is to cook food over smoldering plastic. Let me say 2 things.
1) I AM NOT A DUMBASS, really, I'm not. and
And before everyone tells me how dangerous it is to cook food over smoldering plastic. Let me say 2 things.
1) I AM NOT A DUMBASS, really, I'm not. and
2) He put the slices of the swingset up nicely in the back yard until he can "haul it off."
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