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Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Okay, so I have an appointment at my doctor's office to get my "coping with life" pills. My Mom and Dad pick me up, I have no car because Joey's truck died and he's driving mine to work. Anyway, I walk outside and light up a cigarette while waiting for the parents. Lo and behold, our Golden Retriever/Lab mix, Sable, brings something the bottom of the stairs. It's a damn chicken, bloody, de-feathered, yet still breathing. Yep, a semi-live chicken. My first thought is "some of these people up here shoot dogs for less than this! You don't mess with someone's chickens around these parts." Sable will be fenced in shortly, and she'll have 2 chicken free acres to roam around on. I call my husband and his advice is to "conk it in the head with something." Now, there are many things I will do, conking chickens is not one of them. So, I wait until my daddy gets here, he grew up on a farm and knows a thing or two about chicken conking. So, he conks the chicken, puts it in a garbage can, closes the lid and off we go to the doctor. Upon arriving back at my house, I go into the house for a plastic bag for my dad to put the chicken in and carry it off somewhere. Dad opens the lid and this damn chicken is still alive and it's laid an egg!!! A few more conks and she's a goner, she's put in a plastic bag to be disposed of. The hubby comes home and I relate all of this to him as we are smoking a cig on the front steps. Then we hear a weird sound, coming from the back of the house, the huzzband walks around the house and the next thing I hear is:

Kaylee (which is how he says Kellie with his drawl and all)
Kaylee, Sable has gone and got a damn duck, a frigging duck,
what the hell....shit....let them shoot her, hell I'll give them the bullets.

***The duck was not harmed in this incident and waddled it's way home. The chicken had a no chance to make it. And y'all know me, a total camera whore, I had to take a picture of Sable's capture for all of y'all!!"

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