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Driving Mrs. Crazy...LOLOLOL

Friday, September 02, 2005

I don't think I've mentioned this as of yet. But if you've read my blog, you know my mom can be, ummm...hard to deal with at times. I love her with all my heart, but sometimes she lives in an alternate world where no curses are ever heard, or needed, ladies never drink too much, and God knows they never brawl. Hell, I've done all three and will probably do so again before I die. My dad is, believe it or not, more laid back. He's a Southern Baptist Preacher. Anyway, my niece and her hubby are taking the grands, my mom and dad to the Bahamas for a week. They leave tomorrow. My niece has already spoken to Poppy (my dad) about the fact that the Bahamians may come up and offer some herb for sale, and she ain't talking about the kind you cook with. My niece just wanted to let him know so HE could talk to MOM about this. Mom, upon finding this out, wondered, "Well, she didn't even act like your daddy needed to be warned but I do?" I couldn't do anything but say, "hmmm." Didn't want to go into the explanation that Dad would probably stand there, hands in pockets, looking at the ones offering the ganja and say, "Nah, not today." and walk on. Whereas my mom, would probably look amazed, disgusted, frightened, outraged, puzzled or any combination of these five. But, I am sure she would utter her catch phrase. It's a great one too. We hear ALL the time. When a tragedy occurs, when somthing good happens, any situation, anywhere is subject to the utterance of those three little words, "Oh My Word!!!" My niece sends me the flight information for the trip tomorrow and the return flight. I notice the seat numbers and send the following e-mail:

27E, 27D, 27C, 27B

You're like right together?
Oh geezus...what were you thinking?
Or should I say, "OH MY WORD????"

My niece's reply?

I prefer a slow painful suicide.