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In Order To Preserve Peace and Tranquility, I Had To Kick a Nutz Child Out...

Thursday, December 21, 2006


When the hubster and I went to our counseling session together, the therapist suggested we get this book on parenting. We've only read one chapter, but I, as usual, skipped ahead and read a few other chapters. As I've previously stated, I think, I am a yeller...I yell, holler and yes, even sometimes cuss when my children have me teetering on the small ledge of sanity I cling to. But NOW I have a book to help me and by God I am gonna try it out. Today the eldest Nutz child, Nicklaus, (10) decided to pitch one of his screaming hissy temper tantrums. These types of fits originate in Hell and by the end of them I am usually Satan incarnate. The tantrums are the sort in which, for one moment ,you understand why some species eat their young, to shut them the hell up. Anyway, today I was ready.....I grabbed Nicklaus by the arm and put him out on the front porch. I told him that when he'd cooled down he was welcome to come back inside, until then, he could walk around and blow off steam. He could scream at the top of his lungs, he just would not be doing that in my house, I had no desire to listen to it. Incredulously he asked, "You're kicking me out of the house?" And I replied, "That's right." I put his boots on the front porch,(he was barefoot), and told him if he wanted to put on his boots, he should, it would be a shame to be sick on Christmas and not be able to play with his gifts. I then walked back in and locked the door.
After knocking on every door to no avail for about 15 minutes, he then began the wailing about how unfair I was, then the promises began (yelled at ear shattering levels) of how he was now "calmed down." For once in my life I did not give in, I calmly watched a movie with the other two. I peeked through the window and Nicklaus was walking around, boots on, talking to the dog. I'm sure he used every cuss word or called me every name in the book. The next time he came to the door, he yelled, "Momma, if you don't let me in I need to use the phone to call a shelter." He then proceeded to walk away from the porch. I put a phone book and a phone on the front porch for his quest in locating homeless shelters. The entire episode probably went on for 30 to 45 minutes. But you wanna know something? He sure was a calm little lad when I did let him back in. Score one for Momma!!!

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