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Reason 5,682,492 I will NEVER be named Mother of the Year

Thursday, February 23, 2006


I Promise...I did count to 10...breathe deeply..all that crap...And it still didn't work. I was at my wit's end. No one says anything about these types of days in the old Mommy Manual. I am such a stellar example of patience, kindness and an example of motherly love everyone should strive to have...... THAT IS ALL PLAIN OLD BULLSHIT OVER EASY, Y'ALL I would like to let you all know that the following is how, I, the Mom thatz Nutz, handles a full day of whining, petulant, yelling, screaming, demons her children having mild disagreements, and asking over and over again the most stupid ass questions. By the millionth, "Mom, hey, can I do....(insert something totally absurd here) or "Mommyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy can we (same drill) this was my response


I DON'T CARE IF YOU GO OUTSIDE, RUN AROUND THE HOUSE BUCK NAKED
AND THEN GO TAKE A CRAP ON THE NEIGHBOR'S LAWN. JUST DO NOT ASK
ME ANY MORE QUESTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...and, as if any were needed, I received my last clarification, that my firstborn son was indeed, the epitome of a premiere smartass...damn...that apple didn't fall far from the tree, heh? His response to my emotional breakdown above???

Nicklaus: (giggling) Mom, can I pee on their lawn instead? I'd have to wipe my butt with leaves, and that would not be pleasant...would it??